Posts

Update! (From the procrastinator)

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 Oh boy! It's been literally a year since my last post and the world is sadly still in a pandemic.. We are sans one orange leader so there is hope (?) Leaving that aside, I apologize to myself for being so slack after just 3 posts on progress. The truth is, so much has happened. But the whirlwind of my job and life has truly allowed me to be a sloth on reflection on this blog! NO EXCUSES! Actually, I am allowing myself the excuse hehe, JOB related but that takes up a lot of your life when you work to ride 👀 So what has the year brought us horse wise? Layla developed into a beast of a girl! Seriously, look at that neck muscle! She is so smart and kind, I cannot believe I have the privilege to call her my baby! We went to our first show!!! Two actually! What a bundle of nerves I was! But we all survived and I received lots of notes to improve for the next season. Note: lots of tears were shed on our un-pictured second show. Boy was that a harsh one in hot June Floridian weather >...

Inside leg to outside rein..

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What is the answer to life's biggest question?  INSIDE LEG TO OUTSIDE REIN Simple enough, no? Yet possibly the most difficult thing for the mind and body to properly manage while on top of a two ton moving creature. What begins as a simple basics of riding mechanics can easily go from this below... Graphic from  Equestrian Writer ... to this. Graphic from  Equestrian Writer I am getting a migraine just looking at this, but my horse must feel equally as bothered by my mess.  Sometimes, I think we all just need to relax a moment. For me, training on the brain is just as important as my mounted practices. I tend to get overly flustered by the concepts and my inner need to reach perfection and understanding immediately. Equestrian writer provided me with an excellent start to this concept which failed to sink in for years. https://equestrianwriter.com/blog/2019/01/03/how-do-i-ride-inside-leg-to-outside-rein/ Eventually this will make sense. Mayyyyybe.

Imposter Syndrome Part 1, or "How I avoid facing real growth."

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So I got a horse.  Now what? Behind the thousands of photo sessions of my mare and I posing on the ground, is the soul sucking performance anxiety of everything else. While I am blessed to be able to work through and overcome imposter syndrome in my personal and professional life (childhood trauma and abuse is a very dear and passionate subject but I'm going to set precedent to myself that this is not the psycho-socio-eco-over-analyzation blog, this is the over-analyzation horse blog 😉), the fear of failure with my horse is an inner blackhole.  What if I'm not good enough to ride her?  What if she's not right for the discipline?  What if I ruin her? As adult amateurs (in any field), I think we tend to hold ourselves to a different standard. Unlike what we imbue into young children, we no longer believe we have grace for mistakes, especially if we pick something up later in life. As an educator, I've seen it often in mid-career change teachers. These teachers tend to...

Putting on my boots

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I've had many digital and analog diaries over the years. Even with life-sharing platforms moving on to places like Facebook and Instagram, I still privately enjoy writing longer pieces. Partly for exercise, partly for meditation, writing helped me process life happenings. Recently I've found myself unable to reconnect to myself. Not only has 2019-2020 been chaotic for myself personally, the world is on fire and while I don't want to disconnect from what I can do to contribute and support, theres only so much a mind can take. For those in the same boat, take this moment to be kind to yourself.  So, now ends further brain melts, here's a chronicle of my journey with Layla, my 6 year old Friesian Sport horse, my very first horse. I'll be periodically posting here as to not inundated my friends and family with banal horse updates, but also to keep myself sane and accountable for our growth. The connecting instagram will be mostly shares of her and my progress and daily ...